How was Christmas at the Jones House this year? Choose the best answer for each question:
1. Christmas at the Joneses' was:
A. Warm, happy, and low-key
B. Light on visiting family, but full of good friends, which was a suitable substitute.
C. Written with the apostrophe in the right place
2. Favorite gifts include:
A. Slippers from L.L. Bean, to replace the aqua/dark blue knitted slippers he'd had since high school.
B. Three new lotions from Bath & Body Works, which smell appealing and sensual on Wife but not so much on Toddler, who nevertheless brings the bottles to resident adults and then holds up his palms.
C. Dolls, blankets, money, electronic dinosaur fact game, and playdough, all played with regardless of actual ownership. (Well, not the money, although that was much admired.)
D. Two new Nancy Drew games and the next expansion set for Catan, Knights and Cities.
3. The best thing about Christmas is:
A. Celebrating the Incarnation of an eternal God
B. Presents and feasting and friends.
C. Everybody pitches in to get the house clean by Christmas Eve so Mama will be happy.
If you answered A, B, and C to every one, then obviously you know your Joneses.
(No apostrophe)
(Pictures to follow, possibly, if it happens.)
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
-- SJ
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Scientific Ice Cream
At Dunkin' Donuts last night, I ordered a 31 Below ice cream treat:
Darren to me: "What's that? Is it related to a Blizzard?"
Me: "Um, sort of related. The same genus, anyway."
Darren: "Species being 'inferiorus'?"
Me: "Precisely."
We think we're so clever.
-- SJ
Darren to me: "What's that? Is it related to a Blizzard?"
Me: "Um, sort of related. The same genus, anyway."
Darren: "Species being 'inferiorus'?"
Me: "Precisely."
We think we're so clever.
-- SJ
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Lights Up
Me: Okey-dokey, outdoor Christmas lights! I've put up the hooks, so now it's time for y'all to get up on the eaves and shine brightly for Jesus!
Lights: We like catching onto stuff! *giggle* We're catching onto each other! Hey, hey, look at us! We're grabbing the stepladder! *snort* We got your glaaassesss! *gigglegigglegiggle*
Me (good-humoredly): Ha ha. Now it's time to catch onto these hooks I put up here for you.
Lights: Where? We don't see them. What hooks? Where?
Me: Right HERE. In front of you! Come on, catch on!
Lights: Stinky old hooks!
Me: Do I have to show you the smashed bulb?
Lights: But we don't LIKE catching on things! Noooo!
*Sounds of scuffle and conflict*
Me (exhausted): There!
Lights: Hip hip hooray for you. You won.
Me: So why are you smiling?
Lights: We know something you don't know.
Me: What?
Lights: You got our plugs at the wrong end and now you have to switch us around.
*gigglegigglegiggle*
-- SJ
Lights: We like catching onto stuff! *giggle* We're catching onto each other! Hey, hey, look at us! We're grabbing the stepladder! *snort* We got your glaaassesss! *gigglegigglegiggle*
Me (good-humoredly): Ha ha. Now it's time to catch onto these hooks I put up here for you.
Lights: Where? We don't see them. What hooks? Where?
Me: Right HERE. In front of you! Come on, catch on!
Lights: Stinky old hooks!
Me: Do I have to show you the smashed bulb?
Lights: But we don't LIKE catching on things! Noooo!
*Sounds of scuffle and conflict*
Me (exhausted): There!
Lights: Hip hip hooray for you. You won.
Me: So why are you smiling?
Lights: We know something you don't know.
Me: What?
Lights: You got our plugs at the wrong end and now you have to switch us around.
*gigglegigglegiggle*
-- SJ
Friday, December 17, 2010
Sticky Bits
Oh, hi! I'm back picking up these scraps of ideas I left lying around a few days ago. They're all things I've come across in the past year, and they've stuck with me.
1. John C. Wright is a sci-fi author and blogger. He's an atheist-turned-Christian and fiercely opinionated. Probably since I strive in my daily life to be balanced and understanding to all sides of a question, Wright's unabashed biased rants give me a guilty pleasure. Of course, I rarely finish reading an entire post -- he's also long-winded. (Note: I haven't actually read any of his books.) Anyway, I introduce him because it was on his blog that I read something along the lines of, "Most Christians aren't scared enough that they might be wrong."
It stuck with me because it's very true. Deep down, I'm convinced I know God's mind on nearly everything important. When someone disagrees with me, I don't have to extend grace -- except of the most patronizing brand -- because they're Wrong and I'm Right.
"Be scared that you might be wrong" is an excellent reminder to me that I don't possess the whole truth. I don't know the mind of God. And I may very well be wrong on issues I think are pretty clear-cut. "Be scared" reminds me that I need to give myself a generous margin for error -- and then fill up that margin with grace and humility toward my fellow human beings.
2. I read somewhere recently that Christians need to get over this idea that it's always wrong to be angry. Obviously it's damaging to let anger rule you. Obviously we're called to forgive others for personal offenses. But sometimes we need to be hot and ragingly furious. Abuse -- especially of children -- should make us mad. Human trafficking should make us mad. Malice and bullying should make us mad. Injustice against the poor and weak should raise the blood pressure and get us moving.
Not whether it's Xmas or Happy Holidays. Not the terrible service at Wal-Mart. Not the size of the large fries at McDonald's. Anger is good, but dangerous: let's channel it into causes that will make a real difference.
3. From my recent issue of "Writer's Digest": "First drafts are a failure. A writer is someone who doesn't let failure stop him." Or, in Anne Lamott's more concise words: "A first draft is full of s- ty writing." Why does this stick with me? Because I'm pushing myself to finish my writing projects no matter how, um, bad the writing is. So I type statements like this at the top of my stories to remind me to keep going. (I admit, I wrote "crappy writing" instead -- still not a word I use, so it had some of the same shock value every time I saw it on my personal work.)
Also in the realm of unprintable words: I recently came across the sentence, "I'm lazy as f-." It really bothered me. Not for the obvious reason, but because it MAKES NO SENSE. It's like saying, "I'm lazy as kick." or "I'm lazy as bounce." Besides, of all things f- is, "lazy" doesn't qualify. Somebody was just showing off.
4. A recent general email ended with the sentence, "Fell free to forward." I stared at it a long time, wondering what catchphrase or concept I was missing this time. Fell free? Fall forward? It sounded intriguing. It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize it was just a typo.
-- SJ
1. John C. Wright is a sci-fi author and blogger. He's an atheist-turned-Christian and fiercely opinionated. Probably since I strive in my daily life to be balanced and understanding to all sides of a question, Wright's unabashed biased rants give me a guilty pleasure. Of course, I rarely finish reading an entire post -- he's also long-winded. (Note: I haven't actually read any of his books.) Anyway, I introduce him because it was on his blog that I read something along the lines of, "Most Christians aren't scared enough that they might be wrong."
It stuck with me because it's very true. Deep down, I'm convinced I know God's mind on nearly everything important. When someone disagrees with me, I don't have to extend grace -- except of the most patronizing brand -- because they're Wrong and I'm Right.
"Be scared that you might be wrong" is an excellent reminder to me that I don't possess the whole truth. I don't know the mind of God. And I may very well be wrong on issues I think are pretty clear-cut. "Be scared" reminds me that I need to give myself a generous margin for error -- and then fill up that margin with grace and humility toward my fellow human beings.
2. I read somewhere recently that Christians need to get over this idea that it's always wrong to be angry. Obviously it's damaging to let anger rule you. Obviously we're called to forgive others for personal offenses. But sometimes we need to be hot and ragingly furious. Abuse -- especially of children -- should make us mad. Human trafficking should make us mad. Malice and bullying should make us mad. Injustice against the poor and weak should raise the blood pressure and get us moving.
Not whether it's Xmas or Happy Holidays. Not the terrible service at Wal-Mart. Not the size of the large fries at McDonald's. Anger is good, but dangerous: let's channel it into causes that will make a real difference.
3. From my recent issue of "Writer's Digest": "First drafts are a failure. A writer is someone who doesn't let failure stop him." Or, in Anne Lamott's more concise words: "A first draft is full of s- ty writing." Why does this stick with me? Because I'm pushing myself to finish my writing projects no matter how, um, bad the writing is. So I type statements like this at the top of my stories to remind me to keep going. (I admit, I wrote "crappy writing" instead -- still not a word I use, so it had some of the same shock value every time I saw it on my personal work.)
Also in the realm of unprintable words: I recently came across the sentence, "I'm lazy as f-." It really bothered me. Not for the obvious reason, but because it MAKES NO SENSE. It's like saying, "I'm lazy as kick." or "I'm lazy as bounce." Besides, of all things f- is, "lazy" doesn't qualify. Somebody was just showing off.
4. A recent general email ended with the sentence, "Fell free to forward." I stared at it a long time, wondering what catchphrase or concept I was missing this time. Fell free? Fall forward? It sounded intriguing. It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize it was just a typo.
-- SJ
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Bookmark
To develop into a post when time allows:
* Not scared enough
* Anger is good
* Failure and unprintable words
* Fell free to forward
Oh -- hi! You're here? Don't mind me. Just making a few notes here. I'll get back to it in a bit.
-- SJ
* Not scared enough
* Anger is good
* Failure and unprintable words
* Fell free to forward
Oh -- hi! You're here? Don't mind me. Just making a few notes here. I'll get back to it in a bit.
-- SJ
Sunday, December 05, 2010
Available for Marriage (Here's My Card)
Darren and I disagreed on this topic some time ago. I was thinking of it again recently and wondered what a wider opinion would be.
Sometime last year, I came across the account of how a couple met. She wrote about how she'd accomplished a lot of what she wanted to by the time she was in her early twenties, including establishing a sewing business. She realized that what she really wanted was to get married. Her family was part of a loose community of like-minded thinking, and they evidently gathered for conferences every year.
That summer, she arrived with a stack of business cards in hand. She passed them out to the women there, explaining, "I'm single and eligible. If you know any young men, give them my card."
It took several months, but eventually one of her cards landed in the hand of a young man who took her up on it. He called, and after due time (don't know how long) they entered into a courtship.
The story stopped there -- I don't know whether they went on to get married or not -- but Darren and I discussed the girl's technique at length. Here were our two sides:
Con: You'll Get What You Ask For
If you really want to get married, and you are really obvious about it... then you will get married. Probably to somebody else just wants to get married, too. It's only later that you'll appreciate the difference between Mr. Right and Mr. Right Now. Some discreet inquiries are in line, sure, but handing out your name with the announcement that you had your dress and shoes and were just waiting for the man? Simply begging for disaster.
Pro: Way to Be Practical
Single young people are already looking for marriage material. This girl was just upfront about it. It's not the way it's done today, but has in the past -- why else were girls "launched" into society? She could be reasonably certain that her name would go out among people who believed the same way she did, so why not make sure it did?
So what's your take?
-- SJ
Sometime last year, I came across the account of how a couple met. She wrote about how she'd accomplished a lot of what she wanted to by the time she was in her early twenties, including establishing a sewing business. She realized that what she really wanted was to get married. Her family was part of a loose community of like-minded thinking, and they evidently gathered for conferences every year.
That summer, she arrived with a stack of business cards in hand. She passed them out to the women there, explaining, "I'm single and eligible. If you know any young men, give them my card."
It took several months, but eventually one of her cards landed in the hand of a young man who took her up on it. He called, and after due time (don't know how long) they entered into a courtship.
The story stopped there -- I don't know whether they went on to get married or not -- but Darren and I discussed the girl's technique at length. Here were our two sides:
Con: You'll Get What You Ask For
If you really want to get married, and you are really obvious about it... then you will get married. Probably to somebody else just wants to get married, too. It's only later that you'll appreciate the difference between Mr. Right and Mr. Right Now. Some discreet inquiries are in line, sure, but handing out your name with the announcement that you had your dress and shoes and were just waiting for the man? Simply begging for disaster.
Pro: Way to Be Practical
Single young people are already looking for marriage material. This girl was just upfront about it. It's not the way it's done today, but has in the past -- why else were girls "launched" into society? She could be reasonably certain that her name would go out among people who believed the same way she did, so why not make sure it did?
So what's your take?
-- SJ
Thursday, December 02, 2010
In the Doghouse
Way back when we had dialup, and it took twenty minutes to download (upload?) a single YouTube video, Darren sent me this link and insisted it was worth the wait.
He was right. It ranks right up there with the Mancold. Here it is again, for your holiday edification and enjoyment:
JC Penney commercial: the Doghouse. Husbands, beware.
-- SJ
He was right. It ranks right up there with the Mancold. Here it is again, for your holiday edification and enjoyment:
JC Penney commercial: the Doghouse. Husbands, beware.
-- SJ
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