1. Time changes. What more needs to be said? Lots, apparently, considering that we still have to do it two times a year. Whoever came up with this idea didn't have small children. Or at least didn't have to take care of small children. Look, here's a secret about ages infant to four: They don't switch with the clock. So while all you non-caretaking policy-setting people are setting your clocks back and sighing about that extra hour...
... or preparing to go to bed an hour earlier so you can get up an hour earlier and feel rested...
... those of us who repopulate the world for you are dealing with children who always wake up at the same hour. Meaning that in the falltime, we have to get up an hour earlier. And in the spring? Well, here's another secret about children: you can't move their bedtime forward at night to make up for the hour you'll lose the next morning. So in the spring, we lose that hour of sleep too. See how that works? See? We LOSE SLEEP TWICE A YEAR. This means that, because of a policy of mysterious origins and dubious benefits, there's a bi-annual infestation of monster mamas who have lost sleep for no good reason. Are you really prepared to live with that on your conscience?
Apparently so, because we're still doing it twice a year.
2. In related news, I got a migraine this weekend. That happens when I don't get enough sleep.
3. And don't exult over the "extra hour of daylight" in the summer. It's nice, but who needs extra daylight in the summer? I'm a budgeter: I know how to allocate resources. And it's obvious that it's WINTER that needs extra daylight, not summer.
4. Time changes make me cranky. Darren forbade the children from complaining about it, but he couldn't forbid me.
5. I guess he could forbid me, and I could obey him and drop in a pebble of obedience, but I'd rather just make him ice cream for the same effect.
6. This post was going to include several things that have annoyed me lately, but I seem to have expended most of my creative energy on the time change.
7. Stupid time change.
-- SJ
Edited to add: Do you, time-change people, even imagine what it's like to spend a week with a toddler whose naptime is now an HOUR LATER THAN IT WAS LAST WEEK? Can't you feel the agony of looking at the clock and realizing that it says "12:30" instead of "1:30," putting 2:00 an hour and a half out of reach? I think you need to spend some quality time in daycare centers next fall.
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6 comments:
This is one of your good ones. That is what I think each time I read a new one.
Hee! I'd forgotten the pebble story. I find that story puzzling: why would we NEED to put a hand in the opening of the bucket to get the water out? That is not how I would first think of getting water out of a bucket, and couldn't we tip the container instead of messing around with pebbles and getting the water all dirty? And why do we want the water OUT of the bucket? It seems like we'd want the blessings to stay INSIDE the marriage, not LEAVE it. And in any case, this story results in a marriage with a limited quantity of blessings, which gets used up as the wife obeys. Moral: Wives, be careful to disobey, or all the blessings will leave the safe confines of your marriage! By diligent disobedience, we can limit evaporation and spillage!
I hear you....My first migraine in 10 yrs explained.
wow, there is something to be said for having a laid-back schedule... we've not had nearly this much trouble. We just put the kids to bed when they're ready, whatever time it is!
I totally feel your pain. Me, too, all the way, this week.
I never thought I'd comment on this kind of a post, but you are SO RIGHT. Why why why? Why pretend it's some different time? 5:45 am becomes 4:45 am, when you have a kid that wakes up like clockwork.
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